Solway appeared to be approaching him across the room. Hans tried not to smile. She still had it. Apparently, the other patrons of the restaurant had noticed that too, as had his waiter, Gretal, who blushed furiously when he cocked an eyebrow at her. She knew the drill, and would not be asking any personal questions.

He glanced pointedly at table four and back at Gretal, who left to see them reluctantly.

‘I’ve got your drinks here,’ he said when Solway reached him. ‘What’s up?’

‘Something’s going on. I’m running on instinct and something is definitely wrong here.’ She held up a hand. ‘Don’t talk, little brother, just listen. I don’t know why you’re reacting the way you are to us or anybody else, but I’m thinking it’s pack mentality. Do you understand me?’

‘Yes, of course I do. I’m not a complete moron.’ He was beginning to find it hard to think again.

‘I’m going to check out the kitchen,’ she said, looking at him carefully. ‘Can I do that?’

‘You could poke your head in there I guess, but don’t get in anyone’s way. I’m sure they already know you’re here.’

‘How’s that?’ She looked curious now.

‘I noticed Gretal sneaking off the first time I came over to see you.’ He took a deep breath. ‘Wow, this is hard. You need to get away from me. I’m starting to lose it.’

‘I’m not though. Don’t you think that’s weird?’ She stared at him. ‘I can’t read you.’

‘What?’

‘I can’t read you. I’m not getting any vibes off you, thought-wise. Never mind. Can you take the drinks over to Bart? He’ll order for us.’

Hans sighed. ‘Sure, Sol. That’s my job. Please don’t upset anyone.’

She winked over her shoulder as she started the walk down the short hall. ‘Why the hell would I do that?’

He sighed again. This time it was much deeper. These people had no idea who Solway and Bart were, and they had no idea of their relationship to him. He’d experienced this before. ‘Just go with it,’ he muttered to himself as he lifted the tray. ‘Just go with it.’

Solway poked her head around the kitchen door, not entering, just as Hans had told her to do. The chef glanced over his shoulder at the movement, then turned around.

‘Can I help you?’

He seemed nice enough, for a chef. Not that she’d had too much to do with chefs but she’d heard some interesting stories from Hans about them over the years.

‘I’m with Hans,’ she explained.

‘Alright? Did you need to see anything, or is there something I could help you with?’

‘That’s very accomodating of you, but we don’t work together.’ She smiled. It was obviously what he’d thought.

‘Oh. Okay. Just doing a little private tour then?’ The chef’s mouth turned up at the corners. He seemed friendly enough.

‘Is that okay?’

‘Sure.’ He glanced down at her feet. ‘Don’t come in too far. You’re not really dressed for it and he’s already gone off at someone today.’

That was when Solway noticed the little kitchen-hand, who had turned around and was staring at her in a very odd way.

Well this is interesting, she thought.

‘I’m Solway, by the way,’ she said to the chef.

‘Fennel. I’d shake your hand but I’m kind of busy.’ He waggled his eyebrows at her and she chuckled.

‘That’s okay. Can I just watch for a while?’

‘Doesn’t bother me at all.’ He smiled again. As long as you don’t ask too many personal questions.’

‘You’ve been working with Hans too long,’ Solway laughed. She’d almost said “brother” but for some reason restrained herself. It probably had something to do with the teeny tiny kitchen-hand. There was some serious moodiness coming from that direction. The other staff looked a little curious, but that one… she was something else again.

‘I probably have,’ replied Fennel, bringing her back to herself. ‘He’s a good man, but he needs to get back to what he should be doing.’

‘Oh?’ Solway frowned.

‘He’s been with us for over a month now.’

She must have looked confused. She certainly felt that way.

‘Every day,’ he added.

‘Oh!’ That didn’t sound good. ‘Have you lost some people?’

Fennel’s eyes narrowed and he turned back to the stove. ‘He hasn’t spoken with you then. I might have overstepped.’

‘It’s okay,’ Solway replied. ‘I’ll ask him myself. I’m just so used to seeing him doing his thing I didn’t even think it was unusual.’ She crossed her arms and leant against the door jamb, trying not to frown. Hans was running several restaurants and needed to be checking in on all of them at least once during the week to make sure standards weren’t dropping. Staying in one place would not be helping him run the business at all.

The chef looked slightly relieved as he flicked a tea towel over his shoulder. ‘Did you want to try some of this sauce?’

‘Well, of course I do,’ Solway smiled.

She glanced at the kitchen-hand again. The way her head was angled suggested she had been listening very carefully and that glare Solway had received upon first entering had been quite “odd”. The woman hadn’t tried to hide it and the only reason this could be happening was because she had the hots for Hans.

What an interesting situation indeed.

‘Why hello there,’ said Solway brightly. ‘How are you?’

Fennel shot a quick glance at her and then at the kitchen-hand. Solway heard him sigh.

The tiny person turned around and put down the tea-towel she’d been holding, which was when Hans decided to ruin everything. He poked his head over her shoulder, making her jump, and she turned, nearly bumping noses with her brother.

‘What are you doing,’ he hissed.

‘I’m meeting the staff. Why?’

‘Has she been bothering you Fennel?’

‘Not me,’ said Fennel.

Hans frowned. ‘Come on maggot, let’s get you back to the table.’

‘You are no fun at all,’ muttered Solway as he escorted her from the kitchen. ‘Wnho’s the person at the sink?’

‘The new kitchen hand?’

‘Yes. The tiniest woman in the world is doing your dishes.’

Hans laughed once, quite loudly as he sat her back down next to Bart. ‘She’s not that small.’

‘OOoOOOOOhhhhh.’ Solway grinned at him. ‘Have we got the hots for someone?’

‘I’m working you idiot.’

‘Bart. Hans has got the hots for someone.’ Solway grinned toothily at her partner.

‘No, I don’t.’ Hans said calmly. ‘Stop it. You aren’t going to get me into trouble, obviously, but you are going to set off the rumour mill if you keep this up.’

‘Yay.’ Solway clapped her hands.

Bart frowned at her thoughtfully. ‘I’ve never seen you like this before.’

Hans glanced at him. ‘I haven’t seen it for quite a few years myself, but she was usually right about something, which…’ He glared at Solway. ‘…We are not going to discuss now. Alright?’

‘Fine.’ She felt like pouting but she didn’t. ‘You need a replacement for you-know-who though, and it’s been a long time.’

‘Not now, I said.’ Hans stepped back from the table. ‘Drink your water. I’m bringing over some appetisers for you as soon as they’re ready.’ He scowled. ‘Which should be now.’

Solway watched him leave. She was pretty sure he was trying not to stomp.

‘Ahem,’ said Bart.

‘Ahem?’ She giggled.

‘Tell me what’s going on.’

‘You’re going to love this.’ Solway leaned across the table. ‘I don’t know whether you’ve noticed this, Bart, but my brother is slightly good looking.’

‘I’ve noticed,’ he said dryly. ‘We’ve been together a while now.’

‘What? That makes it sound like you’ve been with my brother for a while. Should I be jealous?’ Solway laughed.

Bart smiled. ‘You know I didn’t mean that. Why the heck, and I’m not complaining mind, I’m just curious, are you acting like someone in their twenties?’

She thought about it for a moment. ‘I suppose that’s when he started getting all that attention. I would have been around twenty five and looking at changing careers, so he’d have to be around twenty.’

‘Okay? Explain it to me. I’m very curious about the way your mind is working at the moment.’

‘What happens is he sometimes gets really pissed off that people notice him, and sometimes he gets really pissed off they don’t. Sometimes, back then, if I was there, people seemed to get really pissed off with both of us. I am seriously sounding like a kid right now.’

‘Why would people get pissed off with the both of you though?’ Bart looked confused. ‘That doesn’t make any sense at all.’

Oh stop lying. How did you feel when you first met my brother?’

‘Ohhh.’ Bart remembered it well. ‘I was jealous, okay? I don’t know why. I hoped to God he was your brother, but it was like… It’s hard to explain.’

‘There we go. I suppose it’s some kind of instinctive thing, like you feel you need to compete. But, guess what…’ She couldn’t help herself. There was a big giggle inside and it was going to come out very soon.

‘What,’ asked Bart.

‘The leprechaun in the kitchen doesn’t know we’re related yet.’

‘The leprechaun in the kitchen? What the hell are you talking about?’

Solway swore the sound Bart started making was like a jiggler on top of a slow cooker. It made her own cackling louder.

‘There’s a staff member in the kitchen who looks like she wants to murder me.’

Bart stopped jiggling and looked confused. Then his face cleared and he slapped the table.

‘Ha! That’s what you’re talking about! This is awesome. We could sell tickets!’

‘I know!’

‘I hope you two are enjoying yourselves, acting like teenagers.’ Hans stood over them with two very well presented plates. ‘I really don’t want to kick you out, but I will if I need to.’

That very possibly made them both laugh a little louder than they should have.

‘Another beer, my good man,’ Bart said bravely.

‘Make it two,’ said Solway.

‘Fuck my life,’ said Hans.